LOL

When contemplating what causes loneliness, one thing that God has laid on my heart is that loneliness is a tool from Satan, and if we want to fight loneliness, or fight to have joy, we have to be ready to fight a spiritual battle.

There are many ways that we can be prepared to fight a spiritual battle. Scripture reading, prayer, dwelling on our blessings...but another thing that helps when engaging in spiritual battle is MINISTRY.

As a Mom, I have been told that my most important ministry is taking care of my children and teaching them about the Lord, and I couldn't agree more; however, it doesn't mean that this is my ONLY ministry. I am struggling as a stay-at-home mom to find my other ministries. I can't very well lug three kids under five to a homeless shelter or a rehab facility or a prison cell... so I am trying to explore what I can do from right here where I am currently ministering.

I have started praying that God would give me different ideas that would allow me to share his light with others. The first tidbit that I got was pretty simple.

lol

LOL normally means "laugh at loud" and although "lol"ling will definitely improve your joy level, it's not what I am dancing on today.

Allow me to introduce LOL: Little Old Ladies.

Take a moment to LOL about my LOL, and let me explain.

You may be different than me, but have you ever evaluated the people that are on your Facebook page. Past all of the high school pals, college friends, work acquaintances, and people you keep around just to be nosey are the ladies who blow up your facebook feed with GIFs of roses, "Happy Birthdays" that look like they came straight off of a 1950s greeting card, and reposts of "If you don't repost this, Facebook will start charging you..." These women on my page are awesome women of God who use Facebook to show off how much they have learned about new technology. I mean none of this with disrespect. These ladies are amazing, and I simply mention them here because they may have something in common with me. They, too, struggle with loneliness. The loneliness they feel may be entirely opposite of what I am feeling. They may have experienced loss, abandonment, lack of mobility like they had back in their prime, and they are in need of a pick-me-up.

The verse comes to mind (even though this description may not define the person with whom you make contact):

James 1:27 “Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.”

I earlier spoke about how that we cannot be prepared for battle if we are not involved in ministry. We will never be happy if we are not trying to engage in all that God needs us to do. LOLs are a good place to start that is small and simple. Let's look at some ways to engage in this special group of friends.

1) Facebook: send a message, write on their walls, and for heaven's sake, don't forget to notice their birthday

2) Snail Mail: you can find almost anybody's address online, and if not, just ask for their address. How much joy they will have to find a mailbox adorned with a pink envelope and a sticker that you and your kids crafted and mailed. Don't over think the message or try to offer great wisdom... "I'm thinking of you" will work wonders.

3) Pray: Maybe you don't want to engage in conversation with someone fearing that they might expect you to have a full conversation. If conversation with an LOL scares you, have a conversation with God. You might be the only person to pray for her today, and I can bet that she has probably prayed for you and you never even knew it.

4) Visit: If you need a break out of the house, leave the kids with Dad and head on out to share a few minutes with someone else. Bring coffee, tea, cookies, apples, whatever!

It is a possibility that these women are not lonely at all. You are not wasting your time on an effort to contact them. The benefit of spending time on these great people is that you will probably gain much more than you ever dreamed. Experience breeds wisdom, so there is much that you can learn from an old mom, old wife, old friend. Soak up their advice.

Of course, not every encounter will be full of sunshine and perfection. Sometimes you will get unwanted advice or a snub by someone who might not be feeling a visit today. The enemy is going to bring all of these thoughts to your mind before you even begin, so prepare for battle and don't let him talk you out of it!

LOLs are certainly not the only ministry you can find in which to engage, but it's a starting point. Ask God to give you ideas on how to serve. He'll never leave you hungry.

Robbing the Joy of Motherhood: Comparisons

Have you ever considered just how much joy that we allow ourselves to lose? The Bible promises us joy in numerous locations:

"Ask, and you will receive, and your joy will be complete." John 16:24

You make known to me the path of life;
you will fill me with joy in your presence,
with eternal pleasures at your right hand.
Psalm 16:11

There is no shortage of joy in the Bible, so why do we have so little?

Imagine the last time that you went shopping for a purse. You pick out the perfect one, hold it up in front of the mirror, check it out against your outfit (even coordinates with your shoes!), and so you rush to the counter and buy it. On the way out of the mall, you see someone else with the same purse. Judging by the woman's appearance, you quickly deduce that she is a decade or two older than you and not quite up-to-date on this season's colors. The purse looks hideous against her faded jeans.
If someone her age is carrying that bag, then it might make me look too old to carry it...
If her outfit clashes that bad, then my outfits might look just as bad...
So now you second guess the decision that made you so happy just a few moments back. 

Ok...that's a pretty lame example, but maybe this real experience will enlighten you a little more.

I got pregnant about 2 weeks after I graduated college. Living the pregnant dream, I perfected my nursery, bought outfits, dreamed up adventures for my daughter. I found joy in becoming a mom. I watched as several acquaintances became moms in the months surrounding the time I delivered my first child. I watched them post pictures of their nursery. Mine didn't have painted letters on the wall complete with chevron decor and a custom made mobile dangling over a stunning crib. My nursery was lucky to have paint on the walls. I was a fresh teacher planning on a maternity leave with no accumulated leave time. My husband was a full time online college student. And yet, while I had been perfectly happy with what we had accomplished within our meager budget, it suddenly paled in comparison to what the other moms were posting. Joy stolen

Fastforward. My child starts eating solid food, and I am in awe of her little banana covered mouth. She enjoys laughing at meal times as her silly daddy feeds her. My heart overflows with joy...until I get online. My child, who I have started feeding at four months (gasp!) is eating baby food from a jar filled with preservatives and the possible presence of a number of carcinogens that could alter her life for forever, while super mom has prepared her child diced organic avocado and a combination of freshly pureed spinach and pear. The baby sits in his high chair looking like a healthfood guru while mine dribbles Gerber out of the corner of her mouth. Joy stolen.

Fastforward. My four year old learns all the letters of the alphabet including all the basic phonetic sounds that accompany them. She can decode some words and has an advanced vocabulary. We work for about 15 minutes a day on learning to read, and I have seen tons of growth. I am so proud. Until I get on facebook and see supermom has her 4 year old sitting at a table with a workbook. Kid can hold a pencil right and is practicing his letters. The pencil has no bite marks, and he's written the right letter on the page. I think about the workbooks my daughter has been "playing" with. The pages are full of stray lines. Sometimes she refuses to use a pencil and insists on using a marker. On some pages, she has circled every possible choice in multiple choice situations...I confront her about circling everything and she has a justification for how everything could be a possibility. I remember sitting down one day in front of the computer and hanging my head. I am a failure. Joy stolen.

But then it dawns on me: My life is full of joy until I decide to compare it to someone else. I am allowing the comparison of someone else's situation to dictate how I view my own situation. 

God knew a long time ago that this age of joy-robbing comparisons was coming. In fact, He prepared for it when He gave Moses the 10 Commandments....Thou shalt not covet.

When the 10 commandments were taught to me, I always thought of coveting in terms of possessions, but now as a mom, I realize that coveting situations is 100 times worse. Now don't get me wrong about this being a new age of joy-robbing comparisons. I am sure that there have been millions of people for millions of years who have looked at someone else's life and decided that their lives weren't quite good enough anymore compared to the glamour they saw elsewhere. I mean, think about Eve. Her life wasn't good enough after she compared it to how it could be by having the complete knowledge offered to her by the forbidden fruit...see where it got her?

Never before has anyone lived in an age where you cannot only compare your life to your neighbors' lives, but now you can compare your life to every person that will accept your friend request, notwithstanding all the pictures you encounter in a few short moments on Pinterest. 

The truth for me is this: If I spend my time looking at what others are doing, my life seems to be mediocre. I have robbed myself of so many parenting joys by looking into the joys of others.


Consider this verse:

2 Timothy 2:4
No one serving as a soldier gets entangled in civilian affairs, but rather tries to please his commanding officer.

As a believer and Christ follower, our life has to have a goal of pleasing our commanding officer, Jesus Christ. The commanding officer knows your strengths and weaknesses and takes pleasure in watching you fight life's battles using the tools with which he has equipped you. When I start to compare myself to the strengths of others, I begin to meddle in civilian affairs (not that these aren't Christian people, but my mindset becomes a civilian mindset!) It robs me of the joy that I can have in Christ when I set my standards of comparison to what God has for someone else instead of what he has for me.

I want to leave you with two challenges. Two that you may not agree with...but God inspired nonetheless.

Challenge #1: Avoid Comparative Situations

When you know that you are going to get online and see something that makes your joy in your own circumstances a little bit less, avoid it. If you know a person posts pictures of her perfect paleo meal 3 times a day including mid-day smoothies, feel free to use the "Hide" feature. If Pinterest leaves you feeling like a failure because you put your cloth diapers in the dryer and use store bought detergent instead of a homemade organic concoction, avoid it. If seeing an instagram photo of your BFF out on a date with her perfectly romantic husband leaves you wishing your husband could be more like that, save your energy and do something else. Don't allow the Devil to gain a foothold in your life by viewing things that make your life seem much worse than it is. Instead, spend just a moment reflecting in the beauty of the life God has given you. Then, go do something that makes you feel proud to be one of His children. Love on your kids, call a friend that needs encouragement, write a letter, say a prayer...the list is endless.

Challenge #2: Don't rob the joy of others for your own pride.

Have you heard that studies show that receiving a like on a Facebook post is equivalent to a dopamine surge that you can get from a drug? The internet seems to be the king of addiction. We are addicted to likes on our pictures, views on our blogs, and comments on our statuses. But when somebody pushes the little blue thumb, who is truly getting the accolades? God?...YOU! Me!

I dare say that over 90% of our (our, as in self included) posts are made to see what others think about us! We want people to like us and like what we do. (Keep in mind, I'm not trying to bash pictures that you post of your kids so family can see, or prayer requests or even life updates...just when we post to show off...and we do all the time.)Therefore, it is quite possible that someone, somewhere, is sitting in front of a computer hanging their head and feeling like a failure because I decided to post something about my wonderful life so everyone else could compare their life to it. I know you and I don't post things online with the intention that someone else should look at it and feel bad, but it happens. Don't believe me? Come look at the list of hidden friends on my facebook and see all the great God-centered people that reside there that I have to hide to keep myself from losing my joy! The next time you decide to post something, consider who is getting the praise from the positive vibes received. Am I pleasing the commanding officer, or am I meddling in civilian affairs?

I love what David sings in the Psalms:

You are my hiding place;
you will protect me from trouble
and surround me with songs of deliverance. Psalm 32:7

Tonight, I pray that God will be my hiding place where I can hide to avoid comparing my joy to the joy of others, and that He will deliver me from the pride that I seek when posting things online. 

Be a blessing!

#meatloafmonday

As promised, I would love to share recipes with you. This particular recipe is a #meatloafmonday favorite of ours, and one of my most requested recipes.

Sloppy Joe Meatloaf
1 lb Ground Meat (Beef, Chuck, Turkey, Chicken, Deer...We've used them all)
1 c. Quick Oats
3/4 c. Canned Sloppy Joe Sauce (save the left over sauce for topping)
1/2 Onion Chopped
1/2 Bell Pepper Chopped
1 Egg slightly beaten


Mix all of the ingredients together, and consider the following options.

**Quickest:
Preheat oven to 400. Divide the meatloaf into muffin tins that have been coated with cooking spray. Add a teaspoon (or so) of the remaining sloppy joe sauce to the top of each. I normally wind up with 12 small portions. Bake for 25 minutes, or until the middles are no longer pink.

**Traditional
Preheat oven to 400. Form a loaf shape and place the loaf on a baking sheet or loaf pan that has been coated with cooking spray. Bake for 40 minutes, and remove from the oven. Cover with remaining sloppy joe sauce and replace in oven for 20 minutes, or until the center is no longer pink.

**Healthiest
Use your pressure cooker! Did you know that you can prepare a decent meatloaf inside using a sling of aluminum foil? Prepare a circular shaped meatloaf. Make a rectangle out of foil that is two sheets thick and about equal to the width of your cooker. I achieve this by folding a long piece in half. Add 1/2 c. of water to the base of the pressure cooker. I put a roasting rack in the bottom of my cooker and place the foil sling on top. Insert meatloaf, heat to high pressure and wait 30 minutes.

Let's talk texture...
Basically, you've just steam cooked a meatloaf. If you are a fan of crunchy edges or deep brown color, this won't be your favorite. The perk? The meatloaf will be ridded of a good deal of fat during this cooking process. Want to firm it up? 10 minutes on a baking sheet under the broiler should do (Or longer if desired...watch to prevent burning.) This method should work for most any meatloaf recipe.

How to lighten it up...
Sometimes, recipes can be even better knowing that they have been lightened up to contain fewer calories. For this particular recipe, my suggestion to you is to use lean ground turkey and sub 2 egg whites for 1 egg. While the calorie difference is only a slight difference, you can rest easy in the fact that you can have one more bite in the end. Ha!